Amanda Bybel-Kutner was exhausted and felt dissatisfied with her work in the company. One day, in the middle of a day at work, she decided that was enough and started searching for new opportunities on Google. She stumbled across a personal development program known as Neuro-Linguistic Programming, and the rest, as they say, is history. Bybel-Kutner became a certified NLP practitioner, life coach and certified master hypnotherapist and opened her business. Inner Beauty Bybel. Today, the new mom and entrepreneur based in Tinton Falls, New Jersey, works to help women change their identities and overcome their fears, so they can create authentic and fulfilling lives.
The story of Bybel-Kutner, told at The 1000+ Stories Story Exchange Project:
What was the reason you started your business?
I come from the corporate finance background as a career management assistant. I have always been very good at my job, but it did not “fill” me. I knew I was meant to do more than fill out papers and shake things up behind the scenes. I remember one day in January 2019 when I had that “ugly cry”… if you know, then you know. This one was particularly ugly… I’m talking about mascara and snot galore. Anyway, I did what most people would do in my situation and scoured the internet to get by. I came across a personal development program and got involved in it. For the first time in my life, I began to achieve personal goals that I put on paper. All my life I have compared my success to the CEOs and founders I have supported, and for the first time I was taught that I can define what success looks like to me. When I shifted the focus inward, my whole life changed. Because of this simple but transformational experience, I decided to get certified to teach what changed my life: Neuro-linguistic programming.
how do you define success?
My definition of success is to allow myself to operate from the mindset of excellence on a daily basis. This means that I can define what excellence looks like, what looks like and what looks like for me every day and I can embody it. My version of success changes daily and that’s okay!
Tell us about your greatest success to date
My greatest personal achievement to date is becoming a mom. It is by far the most difficult, challenging, challenging and rewarding thing I have experienced. My son brings me so much joy every day.
What is your main challenge and how did you overcome it?
Something that I have always had a more difficult relationship with are finances and cost. I like to operate from the ‘I can be a million dollar myself’ mentality and while this is a super empowering mentality to operate from, it is not always effective as a CEO. . I started to track my income, income, expenses, investments, and all operating costs of my business in a spreadsheet so that I could make empowering decisions for my business. It has helped me organize myself and feel extremely confident in my financial decisions.
Have you experienced important personal situations that have affected your business decisions?
One of the most important changes in my life happened during the pandemic. I had just found out I was pregnant, so my husband and I decided it would be best to leave New York City and live in the suburbs. It meant going back to live with my mom after living alone for several years (thank you mom!). Being married, pregnant, with two cats, living with my mother was definitely a blow to the ego! Believe me, I am so grateful that we had the opportunity to live with her, but running a very successful business was a bit difficult mentally. At the same time, my father was also in decline. He was diagnosed with cancer and was in critical condition. I lost my father in September 2021, when I was 6 months pregnant and about to facilitate my first retirement for my business. It was something I could never have mentally prepared myself for. I truly believe that everything happens for a reason and with this experience I have also been able to help so many other people who feel like the world is falling apart. I felt guilty for being happy for my baby when my father just passed away. I felt the guilt of straying from my business, the guilt of being sad when it was a happy time. There were so many emotions at the same time. To be honest, that’s life and it’s so normal to have human experiences.
What’s your biggest tip for other start-up entrepreneurs?
My biggest advice is to start. Start with inspired, messy action and learn from there. Let it be fun. To learn. Aim for excellence (not perfection) because your voice matters, your story matters, and getting caught up in the little details will keep you from sharing your light.
How do you find inspiration in your darkest days?
I just remember where I was and find gratitude for myself for making the decision to show up for my big goals and dreams. This simple change makes me feel inspired.
What is your most important model?
I have several models that have inspired me in many ways. I think because of the season I’m in right now and becoming a mom, my most “important” role model is my own mom. Before having a baby, I never realized the full time commitment to be a mother and now I have a whole new perspective and a whole new respect for my mother. She made it so easy!
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